Chapter 512 (Update..Is time for update)~

Cause afraid doesn't know when the timing..

Even is past already just let it be~

Nothing.Never.Easy.For.Me..

-Phoebe-

Feel like so many thing to update..@~@!! But head super tired and dizzy so make it short as short as possible..

1. Hope Aisyah love the present I make for her..*pouts*~~TT
2. Errmm..Faster do finish my project..=_=!
3. Rest more..~
4. Head thinking negative please la go away la..
5. Scare of the working memory??We all be big enough to think rational..Settle..
6. Haixz..I just offically emo..=/~

Alright..Like I mentioned a lot of thing to post but..Well..Haixz..=/...I just have to keep it to myself cause know why??Cause I scare making myself suffering..Remember this year resolution is less regret more happiness..Did I really type down my resolution..I think nope but I remember is something less regret more happiness..

Even I can't get it but if I never regret then I am alright..~~More than alright I guess..Tee Hee..

I think I last week notices a new stuff..

I don't afraid of stranger but I am afraid of scary human..=..=

Is like if my sensitive can feel scary then 100% I feel that person is scary..So sorry..My weakness huh?

Nah..I still the same..Anti Social yet Talkative..

The End..Need to rest soon..*yawn*~~T_T

Write at 31.03.2014 by -VoN S@N-

Chapter 511 (Post for MH370)

Since last two week Saturday I get to know the news of MH370..It was shock and sudden..=/

Then I heard from my sis about today Prime Minister Najib will announce as in assume MH370 had crush into the Indian Ocean..

My geography of world is not good so I have no idea how and why must assume and such on..

Still..R.I.P to MH370 pilots, crew member and passengers..=(

Today went out with papa with those radio saying like consult message and stuff and then I was silent myself thinking:-

 "I couldn't said so much of encouraging word because the main fact is I will never understand how those family members feel".. 

I was like I can be a good consultant to my friends and telling them doing this and that is so not good but what I am saying I just can do as reference~

Anyhow I still hope at least can have the plane come out??=/..I mean such a big mass object..How can it lost??It make me feel like I am so so freaking tiny..Maybe one dust can just blew me away..

After seeing like this..I am like "I don't want to add up my enemy..NO ENEMY..Just stranger is more than enough"..

Write at 25.05.2014 by -VoN S@N-

Chapter 510 (Head super dizzy..*pouts*)

This character was made during I was addicted on gaia player..

I remember I was wanted to make a story about a prince with all girls??I mean like those palace..

Is like a palaceXloveXjealousXgirlpolitic..

Ok..That what happen when my imagination gone wild above..*YAY*

Alright better doing job job job cause need earn lot of money..TeeHee!

One thing I can confirm myself so playgirl somehow is I really like people to love me??*wink wink*

But I don't want any commitment..=_=..

I mean I also love everyone mah..so same same la..?? I don't know what I want..

Today visit Miyan and other promoter at Big Aeon also visit Mr Gangster at Parade and I actually have this weakness when people said "I know la..You don't want to accompany me eat~~"..I was like "NO..=-=".."OK, let eat"..

Haha..Soft heart *pouts*

And thank to Miyan and her supervisor cause got job at Big Aeon..XD..Wanted to work at Chimera cause their company really mostly is promoter job..*wink wink*..

I still wanted to find a long commitment job..Neh~:D

There so much thing for me to do..Hope I got enough time..TEE HEE..

Write at 22.03.2014 by -VoN S@N-

Chapter 509(Don't know what feeling I should have again..*pouts*)

I love this pic..I look so reporter feeling...

I guess I really love those vintage style..I mean in those style, wearing hat that kind..

Mine is more to modern vintage..Ok

Taking result..><..Huhu~

There so many thing that make me worried and I can't deny I don't know how to show it..I just kept inside my heart and feel the pain slowly killing me??

Taken by Miyan..
*My own find happiness, I will never let anyone destroy nor steal from me*
*I will use all my way to secure cause that my happiness*
*Tee Hee*~~

Anyhow I enjoy lot of fun yesterday and I know my coming road is gonna be somehow I don't know how to said..Is gonna be good or bad??I not sure..I just have to face it..

Well I am here to congratxz those who satisfied with their result and to those who don't really happy with the result, hey come on..The end is not here..*saying truth*..

There will be lot and lot of stage coming for us..:D..
PS:I personally not so happy with my result butttttt I also happy with it..@@~~

Group pic..

*pouts*

Somehow hope Adila and Aisyah is inside the picture..

Enjoy much today..

Feel like gonna post and post a lot of thought/story/moment in my blog..

TEE HEE~~

Write at 20.03.2014 by -VoN S@N-

Chapter 508 (Always afraid..=/ )

Cause I don't know where I put my headband so now I wearing my beloved detective cap..:3~

Oh well..I know I gonna die soon..I guess soon..Eeep..See my eyes bag..:(..*pouts*!!:(

I like got too many dream to archive so need lot of time to make sure it happen..X)

I am like lying to myself so I can err die slowly..*pouts*

Finish work at Big Aeon..Meeps..I miss those aunty..I am serious..They are so cute!! Haha..Can't deny aunty is always cute..*MY MOM IS CUTE!!SUPER CUTE*!

So this time I met certain friend and I plan to write here cause you know I quiet somehow..Haha..There is:-

1. Miss L.A Coffee Girl..She super fair, super cute super leng lui..:D
2. Magnum Ice-Cream..Ryan's Partner..His name is Danson..This one I never really talk to him cause he scary but well he add me in FB so ok and I notice he is younger than me 1 year which I feel he look like same age as me..=_=!
3. Cheese guy and girl..I can't recall name..I know both are friendly..TEE HEE!!
4. Mr Quacker Guy..:D!!I call him Mr Lai
5. This girl..Super cute..She last week is ice-cream girl but this week become Parade..:3

Actually I do feel bad..Somehow..Cause if a person make me feel scare, I will totally show my guard shield toward to it doesn't matter is who cause I don't know why..My insecure feeling is always high..If I feel unsafety, I will do something to make me feel safety..=/

So sorry to the new friend who want approach me but I don't want cause I scare!~Sorry..I will add soon but not now..I afraid..:(..I don't know how to communicate with human..:(

I miss ACCA, LUFFY..

I miss Crystal, Ching Hui, Seaw Huey, Sook May and blah blah~

I miss Voon Yee, Aisyah , Adila , Wai Mun , Gwen Ling..

I miss a lot of human..=/

Write at 18.03.2014 by -VoN S@N-

Chapter 507 (Nothing is forgotten even is can't remember)

The thought of posting pic..Cause is a must for me..

I can't remember stuff..I hate myself..

I enjoy everyday is like everyday is a new day for me..

I know my mood is still unstable but I will try my best control myself ??Cool down myself??Calm down myself..Haixz~

Need to talk happy stuff..Working today..Met a lot fun and awesome human..Thank to Miyan and actually I will get nervous and emo when the stuff I have to terlibat my friends..So is suck..THANK MIYAN..Who Miyan??She Voon Yee..LOL!

So who the new friends I consider I know and feel happy to know..:-

1. Miss Angel Wen Qi..(She Pantene/Head and Shoulder Promoter)
2. Miss Jasmine (She Miyan Friend and she cute and adorable)
3. Mister Nameless Cliff...(Nice guy who offer me cereal but my first remember is he bang my nose..PAIN~)
4. Miss Kewpie(I know she from my school but I only talk to those who I really close so sorry..TT)
5. Mister Magnum Ice-Cream(He is..Err..Miyan's gor gor~~=.=)
6. A lot of cute auntie!!! (Example Laurie, Joy, Ambil pur, those giving drink sample auntie~~Tee Hee)

I not sure I did left out people or not but I can recall is all these human..

Although working for 2 day only din't meant a lot but is like already part of my story..Working as promoter, I cannot imagine working long period and get close with everyone like everyday??

So I only can post whoever I can remember in my blog cause I still a anti-social fella..*pouts*

Study la..=_=..haixz..Dying..GG..=/

Write at 10.03.2014 by -VoN S@N-

Chapter 506(Sensitive..Isn't that the worst of it?)

When reality is too cruel for me to handle, 

I rather just close my eyes and start living my own dream cause I am afraid to see stuff to hurt me deeply..

I wouldn't wanted to said that time you treated me is how..Is good is bad is real or is fake..No one can judge about it..

I will just said that was once a sweet long period in 2014 during January till middle of February..

I won't regret nor what..Just appreciate for what I having now..

Even everything change but I am very sure that day, that time, that year is recorded already..Tee Hee~

Can't deny I was kinda shock to got a wechat msg from you..I don't know I should feel happy or frustrated or feeling normal??

But I know deep down or I use my sixth sense feeling to sense actually you forcing yourself talking to me..Haixz~

If like that , I really hope to tell you don't talk to me la..Let everything cold down then talk to me??I don't mind..I know this gonna add my scar to more deep level but isn't that the process to gain my original back?? 

Haixz..I miss you..=/...Super duper miss you..

Can't deny I am happy that I can see you just awhile before I back..Even is less than a min but haixz..:/

Yesterday phone call with my babe Crystal..I think my shield is already long time broken..I wanted to cry out loud but I can't..

I feel useless and stupid..

I wanted to post a lot of stuff at anywhere but my limit is off..I can't do anything..

I cried cause I afraid..I more afraid than anyone..I don't want or never want to lost anyone that important to me again..

I think my weakness never really gone..I still afraid of losing friends..I just damn freaking afraid..

I don't know if I am getting over you,

or just getting used to the pain??

Haixz~~=/

Write at 07.03.2014 by -VoN S@N-

Chapter 505 (Exhausted??Tired??Dammnit??The sickness)

We once have problem cause of our personality..

We once dislike each other cause that natural..

We once get worried for each other cause that what make us can build such a strong friendship

Even now everyone have their own life but we also trying our best to fulfill the dream of reunited together cause we all deep down cherish each other very much..
To the 5 lengluis I always love:-

1. Adila the pretty leader~
2. Wai Mun the second leader I would said..:3 
3. Gwen Ling the pretty lady-like girl..
4. Voon Yee the angel-like-devil~
5. Aisyah my boyfiee..LOL!!*settle de* ..The monster~
6. Me..The weirdo weird in the group..:)

Everyone is the main character for itself..So if this is gonna be a story,it will be the awesome story that you all will love it till the end..Awww~~*day dreaming*~

It was an awesome day with them..Can't deny all of us love to talk picture..Our cool and unique personality make us more cherish each other than ever..~:)..At least,I love them a lot..Really a lot..Tee Hee

Hrmm..Salary out de..Feel like gg..Feel like dying..TT..Haha..How to survive??Try my very best..Since I already bought so many long term item during January and February..Nyaaaa~~

Persuade persuade..My ACCA dream~~My 1st perfect dream that I wanted to archive..ACCA~~ACCA~ACCA~~

Next next remember in post January..The first ever post..Ya exercise..Finally can see a bit result but no giving up cause with my personality that won't stop eating those junk food..So I still need to exercise to prevent gaining fats and the 30min is actually can calm myself..I mean really..So I hope I will still continue..No give up..Make it like a present for myself..=3

I been addicted to Cecile Corbel's song..Her sound is like goddess, the way she play the harp is so elegant till I don't know how to describe and that remind me how much I like to listen classical song somehow..Especially those song that gave me a deep meaningful meaning..Tee Hee!!

Von, please recover yourself as fast as possible..You got too many event/project to be do..OPMAW's boss must be tough and steady..X3

Write at 06.03.2014 by -VoN S@N-

Chapter 504 (That not call recover ok..=/)

Taken on Monday..My beloved husband..Hehe~!

Shit..My fat face..:(..*pouts*..

Need to be more consistence and more hardworking for it..

Meanwhile be serious about academy..I really don't want make people worried me..=/ Haixz~

I thought a long time..Am I recover?? Full recover??Actually think properly is no..:(..

I can be super ok, super normal and super happy but seriously..I hope we both can talk..I miss you..:(

I miss our friendship more than anything..I tell Voon Yee I don't dare to change profile picture anymore cause you will no more like it anymore..What I can do to get your attention like last time..

I wouldn't need to do anything and you will pop out yourself just for me..Just for this selfish girl..I can't read back those conversation..Is making me pain..

Although what..I still use your name..Like "I wish is was you who talk to me" when I talk to my friends..Put you into my joke..Cause I need to be like normal..Haixz..

Please..I everyday praying that you will talk to me..Don't let me wait too long..Don't let me feel struggle..Don't let me feel suffer anymore..Can you??Please..=/

I still like an idiot waiting you to find me chat one day..Please make it happen..Please..

Anyhow conclusion..Be happy and smile..

Haha..There so many stuff I feel like doing it..First of it is to ermm well help my boyfiee..Hope I can help her..No obstacle and such thing..Me love boyfiee..:3

Second is exam+persuading skill..Neh..

Ermm..The next 3 following day please make it success..My dad won't kill me right..Tee Hee

Please be normal ya..And ya..I telling my boyfiee the reason I exercise is like I wanted to have something I want for myself not everyone..Maybe is like building my own confidence..Nah who know right..:)

PHOEBE TAN VON SAN!!JIA YU..YOU CAN DE!! TEE HEE..To archive a lot of your dreams and stuff and everything..Tee Hee~:)

Write at 04.03.2014 by -VoN S@N-